Tragedies with Tele-Customer Service Representative(s)

Your name please?

(Mobile rang)
Me: Hello!
Customer Service Representative (CSR): Sir, we are calling from ABC bank. Can I have 2 minutes of your time please?
(I am decent guy and a naive too and I just got my new mobile!)
Me: Sure
CSR: Sir, we have this plan... blah... blah...blah. My I know your age please
Me: 25
CSR: Are you salaried or self-employed?
Me: Salaried
CSR :May I know your annual salary?
Me: Rs.2.5 lakhs
(After answering all questions, revealing almost all my personal information, except the moles on my body…)
CSR: Why don’t you take this plan A?
Me: I am not planning to invest anything now.
CSR: Why sir? Then take this plan B na… this is very useful for you.
Me: Thank you, but I am not interested
CSR: Then at least take this low cost plan C?
Me: Sorry, but I am not interested
CSR: Then ok sir….Then atleast tell me your name?
Me: !!!!??


Who is to be blamed?

(My mobile rang)
Me: Hello!
CSR: Sir, we are calling on behalf of ICICI bank. Can I have 2 minutes of your time please?
(I am still a decent fellow)
Me: Sure
CSR: Sir, We are offering a ICICI Silver Credit card....
(Even though I didn’t have a credit card, I decided to handle them in an intelligent way)
Me: Thank you. But I have already have taken the ICICI credit card!J
CSR: Why and who asked you to take the card before? (Phone bangs)
Me: ???!!!

Birthday Blast or Blasted Birthday!

Once I failed to pay my mobile bill even after the deadline .The customer service representative reminded me for 2 days after the due date and yet I failed to pay.
Unexpectedly, they deactivated my line. No incoming. No outgoing. It was dead
Realized this when I reached home around 9 PM. Since customer service was 24x7, I decided to call later. I was desperate – ‘Cos the next day happened to by birthday and I was expecting a call from my sister abroad.

I called them around 10:15 PM.
Desperately, I tried to reach them thrice and finally got them the fourth time. After all the initial verification, the fun started. I told them about the problem.
CSR: Wait a minute Sir, let me check. Can I put u on hold please?
Me: Sure
(Music)
CSR: The system is slow now; can you please hold Mr. Naresh.?
Me: Sure. I am willing to wait
(Music)
CSR: Thanks for being on line Mr. Naresh. Looks like you haven not paid this bill this month?
Me: Oh... yes… I remember. Actually, I was out of station for past one week and reached home only now...
CSR: I understand Sir, but there is nothing I could do now?
(I was getting desperate and irritated and started cursing myself)
Me: Can you please help on this?
CSR: Let me talk to my lead, please hold on?
(Music started and so did my blood pressure)
CSR: Thanks for being on line Mr. Naresh.(dey ethinivaati da solluve)
There is nothing we could do? ( goyaala.. idhu sollava phone-a hold-le potte.. !)
Me: hmm I guess…there should be some technical way in the backend where you can make the changes. Rite? (I am also a technical guy…aahn!)
CSR: Let me talk to my lead, please hold on? (vendaam da...)
Me: Sure (pottu thola..!!)
(Music)
(I could hear music and also sound of my breath - I was reaching its peak of frustration)
CSR: Thanks for being on line Mr. Naresh.(dey.. vandaam da..)
The technical people have left by 8:00 PM sir. I am sorry that we may not be able to help you?
(Tech guys must be a lucky lot. We used stay in office to resolve issues !!!)
Me: You mean nothing can be done. Tomorrow is my birthday ….and I m expecting a call from abroad!
CSR: Wish you a very happy Birthday Mr. Naresh. There nothing we could do!! Is there anything we cud do for you (solution koduda-na vaazhthu solraan..Raaskel!!)
Me: No (Oru mannum vendaam…un office-e puttitu poi thola!)
CSR: Thank u for calling customer support. Have a great day! Happy birthday once again!
Me :(in silence) @#$^$%^%^&%*()