My Client interaction.....

Month 1
Client: I want these 5 changes to go into production for this month
Me: Out of this 5, the fourth item is not an issue. This is how system works...
Client: This is not how the system should work.(aatha aada aarambichita...)
Me: I get your point, but based on the code this is how it works....
Client: No.This is not how the system should work. This is been there for a long time...and nobody seem to be doing anything for this.(Naanga indha system support panni oru varusham thaan aachi... pazhaya team kitta sollama.. enga kitta vandu thaali arukira..)
Me: Could u please tell me how it should be done. (Saniyane..solli thole..)
Client: See..you dont know... thats where the problem is..(looosu..aadhan theriyaadhunu solren le...)
Me: Ok.. could u please help me fix this or suggest a way...
Client(Shouting) : Even i dont no...(adukaa indha sound..??Raaskel!!!)
Me [start slogan] : Ok.. We will analyze and get back to you..
Client : When will I see the changes... (naange eppo ninaikiromo appa thaan nee paarka mudiyum :))
Me [start slogan] : Ok.. We will analyze and get back to you at the earliest..(appa kooda adhe dialog thaan...pechu maaramatom -le)


Month 2:
Client : Where the changes that supposed to go last month....
Me [start music]: All the 4 changes are ready... we are finding challenges with one change that we discussed last time....
Me : So can we move ahead with 4 changes?.. and we could take the last change seperately...
Client(Shouting): No.. everything has to go together...(adhaan 4 tharom-le... onu kammi panna koranja pora??..indha aadi thallupadi offer illaya??? )
Me : OK...sure we will do it.... regarding the change that we discussed last time... i have sent an excel sheet with data..
Client: That is all wrong....thats of no use to me.. ( Ne irundhaa kooda thaan yaarukum use ella... naange edhavudhu solroma???..)
Client : See this how i want you to do it... (oh..solution kodukura alavukku nee avalav periya appatuckera??)
Client : blah... blah... blah... ok..got it? (Ennala mudiyile..[Put phone on Mute]...)
Me [rising BP]:???!!! (oru maasathula 5 cR pogurathu solution ketta... oru CR-kku 5 maasam edukira maaadhiri solution solre... naadhaari..)
Me [pointing finger to myself] :(idhu unnnaku thevaiya??...unna evanda solution ketka sonna??!!!...)
Me: Thanks...I have made note of this... we will implement and get back to you...
Client : When will this happen? (indha loosu thaanama solution koduthutu...eppo-nu kelvi vera??? Indha solution implement panna sollalam.... pannamaatom-le.. pinna eppidi solradhu??? ;-) )
Me [start music]: Ok.. We will analyze and get back to you at the earliest..(Eppudi:))


Month 3:
Me : The agenda is to discuss the changes for this month.. (Nakkal pudicha Naai.. enna pesudhu paaru!!! ;-))
Client [Shouting]: Where the changes that supposed to go last month... its already been 2 months...blah.. blah
(Why tension? cool downn.... cool down... cool down... Be happy.... ;-))
Client : Where the changes that supposed to go last month...
Me [start music]: All the 4 changes are ready... but we some challenges in implementing it.. actually what happened was... blah.. blah.. blah...(nee maatum thaan kadhai solviya...naanum thaan solven...)
Client [Shouting]: This is frustrating... blah..blah... blah...
My Manager: We apologize for the delay... we are also parallel lookin for alternative solution...we have talked to highest level to get this resolved.. please bear with us... (indha kadai eppo nadandhadhu...???)
Client: OK..
Me [start music]: Out of these 4 can make move the 2 changes for this month... and since there is a dependency the other 2 can go separately... (eppudi enga idea...??)
Client: OK..so is it available for test now..?? (ennama.. takku-nu ketaa ena solradu..inimel thaan adhan 2 CR start pannanum...)
Me: Yes...we are in the final stages of testing.. and we will be ready by tomorrow.. we will drop an email...(ennalam solli samaalike vendiyathu irukku... ippave kanna kattudhe.... dey raasa..andha 2 CR start pannunga pa....)
Client: I will be expecting it.. (panniko... so what??)
Me: Sure... thanks for your time...
My Manager: Thanks for your understanding....(idhu oru extra bit!!!)


(After few days...finally provide changes for testing)
Me: Can we move this to production tomorrow...?
Client: No.. i want 2 weeks to test...(nee fail-nu thaan sola pora...adhu 2 weeks venuma.. ippa ve sollu)
(After a week..)
Client: I want to make this change...Please make the change and let me know.. (sethaanda sekar!!!)

Month 4:
Client [Shouting]: Where the changes that supposed to go last month... its already been 3 months...(nee change pannum sonnadhu nethu... odane 3 months-nu dialogaa..)
Me : Actually... as per the process.....blah blah.. (poi sonna bojanam kidaikaadhu.... naan solra poikku marana patni thaan :0)
Client [Shouting]: Where are the other changes... ?
My Manager(Same bit): We apologize for the delay... we are also parallel lookin for alternative solution...we have talked to highest level to get this resolved.. please bear with us... (adhe dialog... same last month..!.)

(After few days.. 2 changes are implemented in production)
Month 5:
Client [Shouting]: Where the changes that supposed to go last month... its already been 4 months... I have got one urgent change.. this needs to implemented now.... (now-aa??...ennadhu idhu sinna pulla thanama irukku....idhu enna change-a ella omlette-a??)
Me : Actually... as per the proces..... blah.. blah... (eva kitta pesi pesi.. ennakku BP eruthupa...) so we can club this change make make it as 3 changes.. will that be ok??
Client [Shouting]: OK... when will it be? (thirupi paaru...ippodhaane sonnen...late agum-nu)
Me: This week...(dey raasa.. velai panna arambigada!!!)
(Finally provide changes for testing)
Client : OK... out of 4 changes only 2 passed... move them to production... (indha maadiri.. agambaavam....aanavam...thalaiganam ellame... edhu work aacho.. adhe production-ku pogasolradhu evlo nalla irukku? Idhu thaan oru nalla client-kku alagu.. adha vittu-tu.. everythings should go-nu sonna... eppdi thaan agum...)

After sign off..Out of 4 changes... all the 4 are implemented...(Client fail sollita.. naange ketkenuma..??? Naange sonna nee ketiya...?? naange 4 changes pannanum-nu commit aayita.. thirumba roll-back pannave maatom...:) )!!!
Avan.. avan 10000 users vechitu problem ellama irukkan.... indha oru user vechitu naan padura paadu irukke......